As a husband, father, and believer in Christ, I’m continually reminded that becoming a better man is an ongoing journey. It’s not about reaching a specific “destination” but about progressing each day, shaping ourselves in the way God intends. Whether it’s at home, in my faith, or in my work as a cloud engineer, I try to be intentional about living a disciplined life.
I want to share a structure that I use as a framework for self-improvement. It’s grounded in faith, influenced by both biblical wisdom and practical steps that have been invaluable in my own life. I hope this resonates with you as someone looking to be a better version of yourself.
1. Believe in God First and Foremost
This isn’t just about belief but about prioritizing God in everything we do. When our relationship with God is solid, we have a firm foundation on which to build the rest of our lives. Start with the book of Proverbs—it’s packed with wisdom on everything from relationships to work. And, if you can, make a commitment to read through the entire Bible. Every page has something to teach us.
“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.” — Proverbs 9:10
2. Work Out Every Day
Physical health is often overlooked in spiritual circles, but it’s a significant part of being disciplined. Taking care of our bodies is a way to respect the temple God gave us. I like to mix it up with cardio, strength training, and flexibility work. Think of it as a physical way to discipline yourself daily.
“Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own.” — 1 Corinthians 6:19
3. Practice Speaking and Being Social
I’ll admit, this doesn’t come naturally to me. As a software engineer, I often get lost in code, but building social skills is invaluable. I’ve started to practice in small ways, like speaking to myself in the mirror or rehearsing my thoughts before a big meeting. I also make an effort to ask people questions about themselves and genuinely listen. Being a good communicator helps in every area of life.
“Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.” — Colossians 4:6
4. Have Good Posture and Hygiene
This might seem trivial, but the way we carry ourselves matters. Good posture and hygiene show respect for yourself and for those around you. It’s a way of saying that you care about the impression you’re leaving on others.
“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” — Romans 12:2
5. Dress Well and Neatly
While our worth doesn’t come from appearances, dressing well is a sign of self-respect. You don’t need to wear the latest trends; just dress in a way that shows you value yourself and the roles God has given you.
“So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” — 1 Corinthians 10:31
6. Practice Good Finances
In my early twenties, I learned (the hard way) the importance of financial discipline. Getting finances in order allows us to live with a peace of mind that frees us to focus on our calling. Stick to the basics: budget, save, avoid debt, and invest wisely. Our economy might be unpredictable, but a disciplined approach keeps you steady.
“The wise store up choice food and olive oil, but fools gulp theirs down.” — Proverbs 21:20
7. Have a Strong Mind
One of the most significant areas for self-improvement lies in the mind. I love to read, especially books that challenge me. Listening to others and having an informed opinion matters, too, but we have to approach it all with kindness and humility. It’s about being confident in our beliefs without being closed-minded.
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” — 2 Timothy 1:7
8. Avoid Addiction
Anything that has the potential to control us can rob us of the freedom God intended. This is more than just substances; it could be an obsession with work, technology, or anything that distracts us from our true purpose.
“Do you not know that when you offer yourselves to someone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness?” — Romans 6:16
9. Be Extremely Kind to Your Family
Our families are our first and most important ministry. Showing kindness to our loved ones requires patience, humility, and selflessness. At the end of the day, they’re the ones who see us at our best and our worst, and being kind to them leaves a lasting legacy.
“Honor your father and mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.” — Exodus 20:12
10. Develop Skills and Pursue Excellence
Whatever you do, do it wholeheartedly. In both our careers and personal pursuits, aim to be excellent. Not for approval, but because God calls us to use our talents well. Challenge yourself, keep learning, and seek out growth opportunities.
“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters.” — Colossians 3:23
Life is complex, and there are many distractions, but when we live by a structure that emphasizes discipline, respect, and faith, we grow closer to who God wants us to be. Start with one step, commit to it, and watch how God transforms you day by day. Thanks for reading, and I hope this serves as encouragement for your journey.
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